Effective Birth Control

Fat Rock, still sober. 3 Days! Woot! So, anyways, I'm a member of a kind of social club. We meet up a couple times a week, exercise, and go home. Every once in a while, maybe twice a year, we try to get the whole group together, have a potluck, and "mingle" because we're "like a family". Yeah, so a ton of people have Kids. Lemur Queen and I do not. We want some, and recently LQ has been jonesing for some rugrats pretty bad. Untill tonight. Tonight she was stuck in a place where she knew no one, had to make small talk, and had to dodge about 25 kids ages 2-12. Screaming kids. Crying Kids. Hyper Kids. Kids who had too much sugar. And she looks at them all, with the adults desperately trying to quiet them and says, "Eh, I can wait a little while before THAT hits us".

Weekend Before Christmas at the Post Office.

Fat Rock, back for a second before I have a two month lapse in posting. Today I enjoyed the usual "Oh Crap That Has To Be Mailed to Grandma!" moment that almost all Americans do, unless you happen to be my father. Major Rock has a mind like a steel trap rimmed with barbed fish hooks. Never forgets anything. Never Procrastinates. Never Rushes, because he has everything all planned out. So my wife and I got our Christmas Present from the Major, and realize we have less than a week to get something mailed to Florida for the Rock Christmas.

So we box up the stuff, and hit the post office. Along with about half the rest of the city. But we beat them into the Post Office, by 5 minutes. So we waited in line, talked about why boys never join ballet troupes (DUH!?!?!) and the Nutcracker Suite. And watched the idiots behind us in line try to be sly and jockey ahead of each other. Seriously, don't walk in with an armload of packages and try to move ahead of everybody else to "just set them on the counter untill it's your turn" We all know what you're doing. Similarly, old people: stop trying to act like you can't hear people tell you there's a line. Stop acting like you can't SEE the line of 20 people and shuffle past it. You are old. You are retired. Your only activity during the day is to dodge a coffin. You can wait in line like the rest of us.

But This post isn't to rant about idiots. Well, maybe a little. Like the Mighty Tanya of yore, an unknown USPS employee actually CALLED THE BREAK ROOM, and yelled at the people there to "get out and help someone". I couldn't believe it! A few minutes later a very grumpy woman cmae up and opened another clerk station, but we were SHOCKED! A responsive USPS! Amazing!


Fat Rock.